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If life is a football game, the second half is just about to start and I sure am looking forward to it!

Looking back on the first half, I am not pleased with my performance. For that is exactly what it was…a performance. Sure there were flashes of brilliance and demonstrations of incredible potential. The reality is that most of it was shallow, self-serving, and egotistical. It may not have appeared that way to everyone outwardly, but it is the truth nonetheless. For those of us who think we understand the game, it is easy to dress up a self-serving life in garments more acceptable to accomplishing our agenda.

The first half mercifully started to come to a close when the seeds of destruction planted long ago in my heart brought forth their harvest. I went through a period of financial and relational ruin as I learned the truth of the Scripture that says, “But those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a snare and many foolish and harmful desires which plunge men into ruin and destruction.” [1 Tim 6:9]

Thankfully, halftime came and the Referee blew the whistle. Halftime lasted about ten years. It started with a move from Northern Virginia to Bolingbrook, Illinois. Through some new friendships and a wonderful, healthy church experience, the Head Coach allowed me a respite from the furious beating I took to close the first half. The reprieve continued when we left Bolingbrook, eventually making our way back to Northern Virginia.

About five years ago the Master began healing the bumps and bruises I sustained along the way. God started training me for the second half and letting me know what life was about. He rewired my thinking as He called me into a deeper relationship with Him, not based on or fed from a connection to any particular religious institution. It is not that I did not know God, grow in my faith, or experience genuine fellowship in the churches I was part of. It is that the constraints mandated by institutionalizing a life born from the gospel became suffocating instead of life giving. I found that the deepest longings of my heart for a life with God could not be met by the programmed religious structure that our culture calls church. Although it was not an easy transition, I see now that leaving Institutional Christianity and becoming free of religion to grow in grace was necessary for the second half.

During the rest of halftime, my grandfather (my hero while I was growing up) died; I entered mid-life with all the associated mental issues that we men face; and my sister tragically died in a work-related accident. Fortunately, my work situation gave me time to properly reflect on those events. Living through and processing them with God, my family, and my friends has been incredibly edifying, despite the inherent difficulties.

The second half has officially started. I do not know all the plays that are going to be called or what part God will want me to take. I do know that the game is about Him, not me, and that final victory is assured. Stay tuned to this blog and other sites as the second half is played.